Wild! Chapter 27

[meredavey]

Title: Wild
Author: meredavey
Series: Brotherhood (although it can stand on its own)
Pairing: Roy/Ed
Rating: NC-17
Word Count for this chapter: 2,404  (36,018 overall)
Summary: Ed decides he wants to find love, something wild, something vibrant and above all something passionate.

Roy was dreaming of Ishval, the fires that tore through the air, that roasted mothers, fathers, brothers, sisters, children in their homes. And Roy remembered all the horror, all the destruction, all the death and then, Riza and Maes were at his side, backing him up as they marched across the fields of death, as they laid waste to a once great city. Torment reined in their minds and hearts. We have to follow orders. We must always follow orders. And out of the darkness, a light rose. Maes faith in him, that he would reach the top.

God, Maes, how I miss you. You have no idea what you meant to me. Everything we planned, everything we shared and you had to go and die before me. Do you know that I wanted nothing more than to avenge your death. I would have gladly killed anyone in my way to get that. I hated, hated, my vengeance burned brighter than the flames I wielded in Ishval. But it was because of an Ishvalan and Edward, Edward who you always believed would be one of the greatest things I’d ever decided on, that I stopped and didn’t allow the flames of vengeance to consume me. I owe them both a great debt. I owe you a great debt.

He tossed and turned beneath his blankets, at first too hot, then too cold, and then his sheets were scratchy and there was no comfort.

I wish I knew what to do Maes, and he dreamed Maes was there. He dreamed the man who always shoved pictures of the family he loved more than anything into everybody’s faces, he dreamed the serious man who would do anything for the people he loved, the laid bak and carefree man he had known in their cadet days, he dreamed the tormented Maes, the strong Maes, the Maes who loved and cared about him.

I miss you. I miss you. Do you know I thought of so many ways to bring you back to life, I was planning it all out, down to the last detail. All the sigils and everything. Even as I was inventing my own array I was overlapping Edward’s, our Edward’s. He was a prodigy, so his might work, perhaps he hadn’t offered enough. I was prepared and willing to offer everything he had and more. I would have sold my own soul, but it was my own despicable nature that pulled me back.

My mind asked me, can the Elric’s afford to lose you, they still need you; you have to help them. You still have a job to do.

Roy shifted in his bed and rolled around, sweat sticking to his skin as he remembered and encounter not long after the Ishval war he’d had.

The day was dark and rainy and he was sitting out on a park bench, alone. He was thinking back to all the horrifying things he’d done, and he was thinking about how can I ever repay all that horror and sadness I inflicted on the innocents, will my own death salvage that? He had bad days like that, where his goal seemed worthless, where he didn’t want to continue on, it was only his idealism and his desire to protect people that kept him going. It seemed other had family to help them heal and grieve.

He knew Maes didn’t talk to his wife about Ishval, knew she left it alone and simply held him when he needed to be held. For a moment Roy wished he had that for himself, but at the same time he would not wish the life he was to lead on anyone.

He sat there in the dripping rain and then the rain lifted. He looked up to see a golden haired man standing in front of him, holding an umbrella over his head. His long hair tied back in a ponytail, his suit immaculate.

“Young man,” his voice was low, “what are you doing out in this rain?”

“Thinking,” Roy had responded. “It helps me think.”

“It won’t help you any if you’re dead.” The man responded, and looked down at the bench, but didn’t sit. “Something seems to be haunting you.”

“Aren’t all alchemists haunted?” Roy responded a bit weakly.

The man raised an eyebrow and said, “Ah. An alchemist? I suppose then you took part in…Ishval?”

The question was hesitant, almost wary of his reaction, but Roy nodded and gripped his coat closer. “Sometimes I wish I weren’t a dog of the military, but an alchemist is for the people.” The older man watched as Roy’s eyes blazed. “Which is why I decided I wanted to protect all those who cannot protect themselves.”

“That’ll be hard to do,” the golden haired man told him.

“Not if I’m Fuhrer it won’t.”

The golden man raised an eyebrow, “That’s a long ways from where you are now.”

“There are people who wish to see change…and they have promised to get me to the top.”

“I understand that feeling of redemption.” The man smacked himself in the chest. “It’s here, roaring in my veins, my blood pumps it through my every day. And every day I look for salvation.”

Roy had looked up, “You’re an alchemist?”

“Yes,” the man didn’t even hesitate. “We both have large goals to fill. Neither will be easy, but perhaps, one day we will.”

He turned to go. “Wait!” Roy called out. “My name’s Roy Mustang, what’s yours?”

The golden haired man turned back to him. “Well, Roy Mustang, my name is Van Hohenheim. I’m sure you’ve heard of me – ”

Roy’s eyes had grown large. “You are-!”

Van Hohenheim smiled. “I hope that we’ll meet again one day, Flame Alchemist. I see good things in your future.”

And Roy could only helplessly watch as the man walked away, his back broad. Roy stood tall. One day, I will be a great alchemist like you one day I’ll pass on this wisdom you have given me.

While Van Hohenheim was never out of mind, he was pushed to the back, so the day that he got the letters he was surprised. The writing was almost illegible, and it looked to have been written quickly, almost angrily.

He opened it and breezed through it with relative ease,

Dear sir, how polite Roy thought, whoever was writing had good manners,

We are currently looking for Van Hohenheim. We have a connection to him. This is of utmost (before utmost there was a word crossed out, a spelling mistake, perhaps? Roy thought and continued on) importance. We need to speak with him immediately. It is about his family and some alchemy. If you know of him or have heard of him in recent years, please (again there were some squiggles crossed out in a hurry) contact us at the address listed.

At the bottom there was a name, written with a flourish,

Edward Elric.

Roy was intrigued, but he couldn’t get away from his work right at this moment and so he put it off for a few weeks, and then finally he gathered up Riza and they took a train to Risembool. When they got there they inquired as to where the Elric house was located. They were pointed in a direction and they followed it.

Roy entered and everything was quiet, but on the floor there were droplets of blood and in a hurried motion he followed them. He followed them to a room that contained the most horrific sight.

There was an array drawn in chalk on the floor, there was blood everywhere, so much blood, so much blood, how could anyone have survived this? And he dashed upstairs quickly and asked their driver about the the closest house. He said there was a place called Rockbell automail the Elric’s sometimes visited.

They got back into the wagon and they were off. Riza asked the driver to wait for them and he settled in to wait.

Roy walked into the house and into the person he would eventually make his protégé, the person who he would pass Hohenheim’s advice onto.

But now, he was a child? A simple child, a child no more than ten and a boy in armor, and this boy must be an alchemical genius and Hohenheim was their father and then it seemed to explain everything.

And as he stared at the boy without his limbs he saw strength and blazing eyes. Strong eyes. Determined eyes and he knew that this boy would be fine. He would make sure this boy would be fine, as Hohenheim had once done for him.

Roy twisted in the sheets again, the nightmares slowly dying away then, finally, there was a good dream, a dream that made him smile.

Maes was twisting his handkerchief in his hands with a nervousness that didn’t seem right on him. His eyes were large and Roy was sure the man might pass out at any moment.

Roy patted him on the back and smiled broadly. “Congratulations!”

Maes trembled and made a small noise of horror in the back of his throat. He made an unexpected keening noise that made Roy almost pity him.

He peered into Maes eyes and asked gently, “What’s wrong?”

Another noise came out of this throat and Roy was really worried now. “Are you sick, is something wrong? Do you need me to -?”

“No!” Maes squawked and shut his mouth just as quickly. He was sweating profusely and looking this way and that as if he could find an out somewhere.

Roy stared at him some more and then Hughes finally relented. “Okay, okay, I’m a little nervous.”

“A little?” Roy asked a bit dryly once he realized what was going on. “I think you’re at more than a little, what are you going to do if you pass out up there? Isn’t it the woman who usually passes out?”

Maes glared at him, “Don’t get snappy at me because you broke your engagement; that was your own choice!”

Maes must have seen Roy’s hurt look because he looked extremely apologetic and even more upset. “I’m so sorry Roy! I just, how do I…?”

Roy had felt sorry for his best friend at that moment, Maes was marrying the girl of his dreams in an hour and the man was so distraught over whether or not this was the best thing for him to do. He was worried that Gracia would eventually regret marrying him due to all the traumas he carried, that she would wake up one day and hate him for everything he had done. Roy wondered if they were looking at the same woman. It was obvious she loved him more than anything in the world, that she would do anything for him, and Roy announced this aloud to Maes.

“So stop worrying and let’s get you married!”

Maes looked towards the bar and ambled over there at a fast pace, grabbing two scotches from the bar tender who looked surprised. Maes handed one to Roy.

“A toast to the last hour of my bachelorhood, eh Roy?” and Hughes knocked it back. Roy followed suit, trying not to laugh as Maes coerced the bar tender into giving him two beers, one of which he drowned quiet quickly and was making his way through the second one when Roy snatched it out of his hand and finished it off.

“Okay, time to get married,” and he led Hughes down the aisle and placed him at the altar.

Hughes sniffled and squeezed Roy’s hand. “Thanks Roy,” he whispered as the seats began to fill. “I owe you one.”

Roy grinned and patted his shoulder. “Just make sure you have your vows and the ring,” and saw his best friend’s face go dead white.

“I don’t know where I put them!”

Roy carefully slipped the sheet of paper into his hands and smiled. “Don’t worry, I’ve always got your back.”

He saw Maes finally relax and grin.

Roy remembered the next time Maes had panicked, when Elysia was born. He could still here the little girl’s cries, but soon they began to turn into something different, a little more horrifying. He tossed onto his side and tried to block them out, but they just wouldn’t go away. He rubbed his eyes as he sat up and looked around the room wondering what had woken him up and then he caught the edge of a sob from the other room. His eyes lit upon the door as he heard the words Edward was calling out. He slowly made his way to the door and opened it, peering into the room. He could see Edward tossing and turning, pain written across his features. He stood there at the foot of the bed for a few minutes and glanced at the clock. Three thirteen. Too late to be up, yet too early at the same time. It was the time of day when night was at its darkest, just before dawn. He stood a few minutes more above the bed as he watched the young man thrash in his sheets pleading for forgiveness. It seemed he wasn’t the only one dreaming nightmares tonight. Edward threw out a hand that nearly whacked the wall and Roy moved to his side quickly. He sat on the side of the bed and gently placed a hand on the young man’s shoulder. Instead he found himself thrown off and a fist nearly landed in his face. He backed off and looked at the thrashing young man.

Roy wished he knew how to wake Edward up. Nightmares were difficult creatures. At times when they were interfered with from the outside they sometimes provoked something in the dream and made it worse. Roy really didn’t want to be making things worse for Edward.

Gently he leaned down and shook the young man’s shoulder. It only produced more flailing around of limbs.

Gritting his teeth he leaned over and shook Edward again, even harder, hard enough that Ed’s head jerked back and he gasped in fear and confusion. He could feel the trembling in the smaller body and he wondered what he could do in a moment like this. It was obviously painful coming up from that dream and Edward, he looked so utterly broken. He looked so utterly lost.

And Roy felt for him.